dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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