check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
