Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize