I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
