I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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