hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
