Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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