You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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