You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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