Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
