careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
A+ Viking dick
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
