handjob tips. give me some.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
