Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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