my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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