U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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