I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
