But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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