yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
