Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Randomize
