DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize