You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
