Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
