talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
