Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
