She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
