it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
