Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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