it's too hot outside to masturbate.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Randomize
