Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
