just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
