I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Randomize
