i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
