In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
