if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
When did angry sex become our thing?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
