If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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