i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Randomize
