check it out our google latitudes are spooning
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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