I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Randomize
