Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
