That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
