can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Randomize