He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
