some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
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