She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
