We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
i now understand why vodka
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
