If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
