This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize