friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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