I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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