About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
