All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize